England v West Indies: third cricket Test, day two – live

33rd over: England 167-5 (Root 63, Stokes 53) Stokes pulls the first ball of the session for four! A sign of things to come? A simple twist of fate? Alzarri Joseph goes short again, to Joe Root this time – Root pounces on it and pulls away for four. It’s a momentous shot as it takes Joe Root to 12,000 runs in Test cricket. What a player. He keeps ticking them off.

Out come the players after the lunch break. Mike Atherton shows he’s down with his Dylan with a nod to Bob Willis (who was a huge fan) noting that there has been a spot of rain during the lunch break ‘not a hard rain though’ before noting the England wickets “Crawley, Duckett, Pope, Brook, Wood – Desolation Row”.

I went to see this show in concert a few months ago and it was spellbinding.

“Bon Apres-Midi Camarade” writes Alisdair Gould.

“I feel awkward travelling on the Paris metro surrounded by lycra and athletics fans and the only sport I am following is wonderful test match cricket via wonderful OBO. The reason I write is to say what a credit Joe Root has been as a player at the top of his sport but with consistent modest composure. Pile on Joe. Bien à vous, Alisdair.”

Probably wouldn’t make you feel less awkward if I told you I’m dressed in lycra whilst sat on my sofa typing this Alisdair? Thought not.

Adam ‘Collo’ Collins has got you covered on the Olympics live blog – not that you’ll be deserting us here on the OBO with this Test deliciously poised? Oh, ok, but hurry back after lunch, you flake.

There’s no pleasing some:

Huge congratulations to OBO stalwart Kim Thonger, his son Tom and bride-to-very-soon-be Katie.

“My son Tom is getting hitched today to the lovely Katie, and I estimate at Root’s current scoring rate the ‘I do’s’ will coincide almost exactly with his century. If Joe could manage to reach it with a six that would be a nice present for the happy couple. My thanks in advance. We might even hear the roar, we’re in Hampton-in-Arden.”

“May I have the rings reverse-ramp please”

“So much focus has been on Jimmy in the last few months, and rightly so, but we are also living in the era of Joe Root. I’m trying to work out if I feel old watching him or not, with his boyish looks and subtle late glance down to third man for four. He looks so serene at the crease and despite having come in at similarly filthy positions throughout his career, so often you feel safe watching him. I’m aware this could be a classic kiss of death, but I’ll truly miss him when he’s not around. Which I hope is at least 3-4 summers and about 3000 more runs from now. He’s a wonderful, brilliant batter.”

Lovely this, from Guy Hornsby.

Apologies for giving a few England fans a fright with my lunchtime score post – I can assure you that England are only five down and not SEVEN, blame my sausage fingers and coffee addled brain.

Whoopsie

Lunch: England 157-5 (trailing by 125 runs)

32nd over: England 156-5 (Root 58, Stokes 47) Alzarri Joseph sends down some short stuff, Root rolls his wrists to control the pull shot and picks up three runs. Stokes isn’t going to shy away either but he’s too early on a pull and plugs it wide of mid-on but safe. We’ll have one more before lunch.

31st over: England 150-5 (Root 55, Stokes 44) The stump mic picks up Josh Da Silva joining in with the Hollie’s rendition of Livin’ On a Prayer. Root sweeps a full bunger for two and then Stokes sweeps for SIX to bring up England’s 150. This partnership is ploughing on towards a hundred, West Indies took the first hour of play but England have taken the second… unless they lose one before the lunch interval. They still trail by 132 runs.

30th over: England 141-5 (Root 52, Stokes 38) West Indies can’t quite stop the scoring, a lot of overs have a hittable ball in them and Stokes doesn’t miss out on a drive down the ground for four. Holding the pose for good measure. Jason Holder tugs his two metre high forelock.

29th over: England 133-5 (Root 50, Stokes 32) That’s loose from Stokes though! Lining up a booming drive off a full ball from Motie, the ball grips and turns, beating the inside edge of the bat and the keeper too, running away for four byes. Not long til lunch, a wicket now would make it West Indies morning categorically.

28th over: England 126-5 (Root 50, Stokes 29) There are two short covers catching to Stokes– GOOD LUCK CATCHING THAT! As if spurred on by the keeper and the fielders Stokes comes charging out of his crease to flog a Holder length delivery in the gap for four. That is some shot. Stokes comes alive in a flash, unleashes some brutality and then goes back to defending the next ball. Wicketkeeper Josh Da Silva comes up to the stumps to Holder. That’d be an inflammatory move for plenty of medium pace merchants up and down the land.

Oh, and Joe Root notches up his 63rd Test match fifty with a languid single.

27th over: England 119-5 (Root 49, Stokes 23) Another good over from Motie, getting enough drift and turn to keep Root and Stokes tied down. A single to each batter keeps the scoreboard ticking in the right direction for England.

“Hi James, can’t be doing Dions without Dionne surely…”

Of course not, Peter Salmon.

26th over: England 117-5 (Root 48, Stokes 22) Another one of Hotten’s hated twos as Stokes glides Holder past point for a couple.

25th over: England 115-5 (Root 48, Stokes 20) Time for some spin. Gudakesh Motie is summoned into the attack, he twirled one through Stokes’ defences at Lord’s remember. It’s Root on strike and he pats back a lesser spotted maiden. Tidy start from the spinner.

24th over: England 115-5 (Root 48, Stokes 20) Root clips away for a couple of twos with something veering on nonchalance.

“Proper criggit, you are getting a Root masterclass” – I text my learned friend and collaborator Jon Hotten who is in the Brian Lara lounge at Edgbaston today, no doubt chowing down on a prawn sandwich and swirling some elderberry fizz at this very second.

“Too many twos for my liking. Not enough boundaries. Put your back into it!” he replies, Whatsapp message dripping in disdain, the rest of it far too blue to post on these pages. Horrible.

There’s no pleasing some people. That’s The Hundred generation for you…

(Have fun cobber!)

23rd over: England 110-5 (Root 43, Stokes 20) Jason Holder into the attack. Can he break this partnership of more than fifty now between Stokes and Root? Not just yet. A full ball is dug out by Stokes and he cracks the wrists on it to see it trace away through the covers for three runs, I do not know how he has managed that.

22nd over: England 105-5 (Root 41, Stokes 17) Shamar gets us going after drinks. Stokes flicks at a length ball and West Indies think they hears something – after some back and forth they send it upstairs but the ball hit the thigh pad and not the bat. Not out. Root now has the most runs of any batter at Edgbaston in Test history. He averages over 70 in Brum!

21st over: England 101-5 (Root 39, Stokes 16) Time for a drink as England bring up the hundred.

Is the OBO Brat? Probs*.

*Have no idea what I’m talking about.

20th over: England 94-5 (Root 34, Stokes 14) Jayden Seales’ brilliant spell comes to an end, he’s got 3-35 from his nine overs in this innings. Shamar replaces him and immediately serves up a half-volley to Ben Stokes who drives with the full face back past the bowler for four. This pair doing a decent rebuild job for England after the two early wickets of Pope and Brook.

19th over: England 88-5 (Root 33, Stokes 9) Too full from Alzarri and Root pounces, punching through the covers for four more.

18th over: England 82-5 (Root 27, Stokes 9) Seales keeps Stokes on his toes, finding some extra bounce that surprises the batter and has him fencing slightly in front of his grille.

Here’s another Dion to get your ears around. Yes, Runaround Sue is a certified banger but check out this album, it’s a beauty. You’ll be air saxaphoning your way through Saturday in no time.

17th over: England 80-5 (Root 27, Stokes 7) Alzarri has been a bit loose this morning so far, Stokes climbs in to a short ball outside of off-stump and crashes it to the fence for four. There’s a hush around Edgbaston as the crowd are completely absorbed by the contest this morning. This is why we love Test cricket.

Speaking of which, John Starbuck has been inspired by Celine D, not for the first time no doubt and sends in this cracker for a song about l’amour. I don’t mind those backing vocals it has to be said.

16th over: England 74-5 (Root 26, Stokes 2) A couple of singles off the over. If West Indies can break this partnership then they will feel truly in command in this game. As it is, whilst Stokes and Root are out there and accumulating they’ll know that they cannot take their foot off the gas.

15th over: England 72-5 (Root 25, Stokes 1) Alzarri (Joseph) replaces Shamar (Joseph). Not the tightest line from the Antiguan. Root collects four with a flick fine and then climbs into a square drive that hurtles to the fence. Stokes gets off the mark with a defensive push past point.

Root has now gone past one Brian Charles Lara to number seven on the all time Test runs list. We are witnessing greatness and have been for a long time.

14th over: England 60-5 (Root 14, Stokes 0) “Will West Indies enforce the follow on?” chirps an email. The OBO mailbag is, as ever, open for your correspondence. If Root and Stokes go quickly then who knows… Well batted. Root shows Brook and Pope etc how to do it – getting a full stride in and planting the head firmly over the ball as he drives handsomely through the covers. Mike Atherton is positively purring at the batsmanship up in the comms box.

13th over: England 55-5 (Root 9, Stokes 0) Shamar Joseph is wide on the crease and angling the ball in at the stumps. West Indies have been on the moolah this morning. Root nurdles a single to bring Stokes on strike who in turns blocks out the over with obdurate defence. Great passage of play this, every ball feels like an event.

12th over: England 54-5 (Root 8, Stokes 0) Jayden Seales keeps Ben Stokes honest with the final delivery of his over. Stokes could do with a score after a lean time of late and his side need a meaty partnership to get back into this game. Brook’s wicket was Seales’ 50th in Test cricket – he’s a fantastic talent.

WICKET! Brook c Da Silva b Seales (England 54-5)

11th over: England 51-4 (Root 7, Brook 0) Pope perished with an angled bat – similar to the way Duckett went last night. Trying to force away on the off side and serving only to get a thick edge back on to the timbers. In walks Harry Brook, fresh off a maiden home Test century.

WICKET! Pope b S Joseph 10 (England 51-4)

10th over: England 43-3 (Pope 6, Root 7) Seales is full and at the stumps, pinning Root on the pad in front of all three. That looks close?! Seales implores but the umpire is not having it and neither are his teammates. What do you know – the DRS shows three reds and Root would have been on his way with a review. Next ball he pounces on a half volley and drives down the ground for four.

9th over: England 39-3 (Pope 6, Root 3) ‘A teasing line’ from Shamar Joseph purrs Ian Bishop on the tv commentary. Root gets going on day two with a clip to square leg. Pope then fences outside off stump and is lucky not to get an edge through to Da Silva. The pitch is biscuit coloured and looks like it should be a belter to bat on under cloudless skies.

Shamar Joseph has the ball in hand. Root and Pope are at the crease for England. Let’s be ‘avvin you.

Here’s the TMS overseas link courtesy of Simon Dennis, and the BBC, I guess.

https://m.youtube.com/live/tbRjiOYeKhw?feature=share&cbrd=1

Edgbaston is blue for Bob Willis today, the players emerge onto the sun soaked turf sporting blue caps and there’s a moving minute of applause around the ground.

I’m off to mainline some coffee before business gets properly underway, my daughter woke up at 3am and decided that was all the sleep she needed. Do I want a medal? Yes, a GOLD one, laced with Kenco.

Here’s a some pre 11am reading for your delectation.

Magnifique. Gauntlet well and truly thrown down to the Hollies stand…

There’s been a gold medal over on Big Sports Day. Follow all the action here:

Gone off dead rubbers at Edgbaston have we?

Preamble