{"id":257426,"date":"2026-08-12T14:17:39","date_gmt":"2026-08-12T14:17:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sports.runfyers.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/12\/keeping-it-simple\/"},"modified":"2026-08-12T14:17:39","modified_gmt":"2026-08-12T14:17:39","slug":"keeping-it-simple","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sports.runfyers.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/12\/keeping-it-simple\/","title":{"rendered":"Keeping It Simple"},"content":{"rendered":"

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A little over a year ago I cleared out my friend\u2019s apartment after he died. He had a lifetime of bike stuff, all meticulously organized and stored carefully for the day when he might need to call it back into service or finally get around to selling it. Obviously that day never came.<\/p>\n

As I went through all this stuff I couldn\u2019t help thinking about my own. Unlike his, mine was completely disorganized, and if I were to depart this mortal plane nobody would be able to make the least bit of sense out of it. So recently I finally\u2026well, I wouldn\u2019t say I organized<\/em> my spare bike stuff, but I at least went through it, put it in bins, and threw out the things it was least likely I or anyone else would ever want or need. (And yes, I\u2019ve already gone looking for at least three of the things I threw out and then suddenly needed.) I also told myself I\u2019d make every effort to look to these bins before acquiring any new bike stuff\u2013because frankly, even if I realize my full life expectancy, I\u2019ve reached that point in every Fred\u2019s life where he has more stuff than he could possibly wear out in the course of his remaining allotment.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, while I may be able to account for my own behavior, I can\u2019t account for the behavior of other people. Consider these two mail pieces I received in the very same day:<\/p>\n

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You may recall I wasn\u2019t going to reconfigure the Farbman<\/a> because I didn\u2019t have a front derailleur cable pulley thingy and I wasn\u2019t going to acquire one, only allowing myself to embark on the project when it turned out I had a suitable top-pull derailleur as well as everything else I\u2019d need to complete it. Well, look what somebody just sent me:<\/p>\n

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Thanks a lot, Johnny, now I have to assemble a whole new bike around it.<\/p>\n

And yes, Johnny first had to email me and ask for my mailing address in order to send it, so technically I did consent, but it was still wildly inconsiderate and selfish of him.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s what was inside the other piece of mail, from regular commenter \u201csbarner:\u201d<\/p>\n

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I\u2019m sure you know that these are, right?<\/p>\n

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Of course you do.<\/p>\n

Well, I don\u2019t. In fact I don\u2019t have the slightest idea. Is it something I mentioned once and have since forgotten about? I mean sure, I could email him and ask, but then he might answer, and once I know I\u2019ll have to put bikes togetehr around all of them, too.<\/p>\n

Then a day later I got a delivery from Ben\u2019s Cycle<\/a>, and the contents included but were not limited to the following:<\/p>\n

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For the record, none of this stuff counts against my \u201cNot acquiring any new bike stuff\u201d commitment, and if you\u2019re wondering why, the answer is BECAUSE IT JUST DOESN\u2019T, OKAY!?! And if you\u2019re wondering what it\u2019s for, the answer is it\u2019s for a future project that\u2019s none of your business. Look, austerity may be healthy, but goddamn it A FRED NEEDS TO LIVE.<\/p>\n

By the way, let\u2019s just take a moment to contemplate this:<\/p>\n

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I ask you: how can you hold this object in your hand and still want a disc brake? So light, so simple, and yet so effective. Sorry, but opting for disc brakes over this is the symptom of a diseased mind\u2013and you shouldn\u2019t take that the wrong way, all I mean is that if you want disc brakes instead of something like this there\u2019s something seriously wrong with you.<\/p>\n

Oh, and if your answer to the rhetorical disc brake question was \u201cMore tire clearance\u201d I\u2019ll point out that there\u2019s such a thing as rim brakes with more clearance. Or, if your answer was \u201cMore stopping power,\u201d well, some things in life are worth dying for, aren\u2019t they?<\/p>\n

Sure they are.<\/p>\n

An unwillingness to put your life on the line for your ideals is exactly what\u2019s wrong with this new generation.<\/p>\n

[Intern: Drop that \u201cOld Man Yells At Cloud\u201d image in here.]<\/em><\/p>\n

Speaking of this new generation, once again I found myself looking at the cycling videos on YouTube and not being able to bring myself to watch a single one of them, because they aggressively rebuff any attempt on my behalf to be interested:<\/p>\n

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Can we please reserve phrases like \u201cThe Hard Truth Nobody Wants to Admit\u201d to situations that actually warrant it, like \u201cSometimes I fantasize about murdering my cat,\u201d or \u201cI\u2019m strongly attracted to my second cousin?\u201d The meaningless difference between the frame materials of mass-produced bicycles is not something we\u2019re repressing deep in our collective subconscious and unwilling to confront.<\/p>\n

Also, if you\u2019re going to make statements like this, please follow through with them:<\/p>\n

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Good, don\u2019t! I don\u2019t want to hear about your gravel bike ever again. In fact I don\u2019t want to hear about any<\/em> gravel bikes ever again. If I could return to any period in history, it would be 2012, which is the year before the gravel bike was invented<\/a>. Then, on the eve of that invention, I\u2019d go to sleep and wake up back in 2012 again, just like the movie \u201cGroundhog Day,\u201d only I\u2019d be really happy about it.<\/p>\n

Though maybe I\u2019d go back even further to before mountain bikes stopped being bikes:<\/p>\n

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Sorry, it\u2019s not complicated. They both suck, just total garbage. Look, just skip the human-powered motocross bikes and get an e-bike already, you know you want one. You know, when this first started happening I was horrified:<\/p>\n

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